Behold! The Power of Cheese!

Holy crap. You and I both knew it was only a matter of time before camembert stopped pretending and accepted its true identity: peace keeper of the world! Only in D.C., in that wacky town of slums and silver plaques, would you hear of something this nutty. Apparently, a gunman attempted to rob a family during a backyard dinner party. After being offered some wine and cheese (and accepting it), he changes his mind, asks for a hug, and leaves. You hafta read this.